In one of his latest weekly roundups, direct-response product prognosticator Jordan Pine of SciMark Corp. declares it’s probably too soon to introduce a Snuggie clone, an idea that peaked a few years ago. TeleBrands’ Goody Hoody, opines Pine, is chasing what “was clearly a fad.”
“Trying to bring it back — even in a new and improved version — is a little like trying to bring back Zhu Zhu Pets, the Furby or any similar craze product,” writes Pine.
Of course, Telebrands founder A. J. Khubani passed on Snuggie several years back and missed out on the biggest As Seen on TV phenomenon of all time. Must still be a sore spot with A.J.
A. J. Khubani gave the world the PedEgg and Ambervision sunglasses.
A. J. Khubani has spent decades convincing people to buy products they didn’t know they needed. He hit the stratosphere with the PedEgg, which has sold 45 million units. His other successes include Ambervision sunglasses and the Windshield Wonder. Fox affiliate My9 NJ recently aired a 20-minute segment profiling the infomercial maestro on the 30th anniversary of his billion-dollar company, TeleBrands.
If you’re going to advertise your foot callus removal product on TV, I guess you need to demonstrate what it does and how it works. Callous Clear from Telebrands may do a great job, but it’s certainly not very appetizing to watch large globs of dead skin scraped off a foot, even if the foot is attached to a hot model. And there are so many steps: Apply the foot softening cream to the callus removal patch, place the patch on your foot and wait a while, then remove it and file your foot. Finally, finish with an application of foot balm.
And what’s up with the spelling? I thought callous meant without emotion, and callus meant hard, thickened skin.
Ye Olde Brooklyn Lantern is a retro-styled LED lantern with dimming function. The 12 LED bulbs are claimed to last for 100,000 hours, but the commercial neglects to mention that it takes two ordinary D flashlight batteries to actually power the lantern. They should last quite a while.
We’re not sure why Telebrands chose to name this flashlight after Brooklyn rather than some other historic American city like Boston, Philadelphia or Baltimore. Pretty sure that naming it after Chicago would make people think of Mrs. O’Leary’s cow, although this battery-operated LED light is always cool to the touch and could never start a fire like an old-fashioned kerosene lantern with an open flame.
The Edge of Glory Knife Sharpener is not the newest product on our website. But this morning when I noticed it on our homepage, I wondered if naming it after a Lady Gaga song has really increased sales of this otherwise unremarkable product. I’m fairly certain that no one will mistake Anthony Sullivan for Gaga, especially since he’s not singing, dancing or disrobing. Nor do I think the song’s lyrics are about a woman try to pick up a pitchman who will come back to her place and sharpen her cutlery.
Vegetable choppers were the mainstay of the pitchman’s pitch at county fairs and on boardwalks decades before Ron Popeil introduced the Ronco Veg-o-Matic, the only As Seen on TV product in the Smithsonian Institution. Not satisfied with knives and graters, hungry consumers are always looking for a new way to slice a whole onion in seconds or prepare a mountain of julienne fries. The latest entry in this crowded market is the Slice-O-Matic from Telebrands, with name and function more than a little similar to its institutionalized predecessor.
Do you live in a household with loud, obnoxious, annoying people, and sometimes wish you lived alone? If so, the next best thing to your own Fortress of Solitude is a pair of myZone Wireless Headphones. They work on all TVs and install in seconds. Just plug the base unit into the audio out jacks on your TV, strap on the myZones, and zone out in a personal audio/video paradise with your favorite reality shows, shopping channels, sitcom marathons, late-night talk fests, and detective dramas. The heavily-padded foam earpieces of your myZone Headphones will cancel out noise from your boorish housemates, smoke alarms, or police swat teams at your door. You won’t even know others exist unless they walk in front of the TV. Need to go the bathroom and afraid you’ll miss hearing about Lindsay Lohan’s latest court date? No worries, because myZone Headphones have a range of up to 100 feet.
It’s obvious the Royal Heirloom Ring, with its twinkling cubic zirconiums, simulated sapphire and thin layer of silver plate, is strictly costume jewelry. And yes, the British Historical Society and Sterlington Collections are inventions of As Seen on TV giant Telebrands.
Still, the Royal Heirloom Ring is a remarkably accurate replica of the ring currently on the finger of Kate Middleton, the future Queen of England, and once worn by Princess Diana, better known as Lady Di (arguably the greatest celebrity of the 20th century). If you love the romance and majesty of royalty, who could blame you for wanting to play dress up with this over-the-top example of royal bling? Here’s where to order.
How does a DRTV marketer “freshen up” an As Seen on TV product when it’s been on the market for a couple of years and sales have cooled? If the marketer is Telebrands, and the product is Cathy Mitchell’s Pasta N More, you change the name, change the color, lower the price and add more freebies. The result: the kinda-new Pasta Boat.