Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she “propositioned him for straight sex.” Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly “bit his tongue and would not let go.” Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue.
Not a pretty picture. Is this Vince’s Pee Wee Herman moment? Is his career as super-pitchman now over? Guess she didn’t love his nuts. Any, he didn’t have a boring hooker.
If you saw our Slap Chop Unboxing post, you know we previously received our Slap Chop and unpacked it for use. We thought it might be fun to put it to the test by preparing a simple three-course luncheon with the aid of Vince Offer’s magic chopper. Vince promises us the Slap Chop will endow us with an exciting life. So how did it perform?
We’re happy to say that the Slap Chop performs pretty much as advertised. You push down on the plunger and foods get chopped. The blade is sharp. While it’s not by any means a precision instrument, the Slap Chop seems plenty sturdy and its butterfly hinge makes it easy to clean. Our major mistake was not re-watching the commercial before we started. Perhaps with some study we could have replicated Vince’s trick of removing onion and garlic skins in one piece. We do think it’s possible to accomplish this feat outside of the TV studio, so we’ll try again next time we chop. Bet Vince didn’t get it on the first try.
We always aim to prepare tasty and healthy meals. Ours is not the home of the boring tuna. So our lives may not be radically transformed due to this kitchen gadget, but we’re pleased to report that the Slap Chop did its job admirably. And we thoroughly enjoyed the gastronomic results. On today’s menu: Tuna salad sandwiches on focaccia, using quality Italian canned tuna in olive oil, homemade salsa with organic multi-grain chips, and vanilla yogurt topped with nuts, berries and dark chocolate. Yes, it was delicious.
Why should unboxing be just for computers and gadgets? If you thought that the Slap Chop commercial was just performance art, you need to know that the latest product from Vince Offer (the ShamWow guy) is very, very real. We ordered ours back in December on the first day we saw it advertised. It arrived about a month later. Now it’s well past the ides of March and we’re just now posting the pix here. This is a direct result of personal lameness. We didn’t want to post the photos until we chose and installed a WordPress photo gallery plugin. This meant we really should upgrade WordPress to the latest version, but we have been too busy/lazy to do so. Until today.
We did make a meal recently where every course was prepared with the Slap Chop, and of course we documented the process with photos. Look for that gallery soon.
If you make the life-enhancing decision to banish boring tuna from your life and become a proud member of the Order of the Slap Chop, please support our site by using this link:
So far we’ve only seen the Slap Chop commercial on the web. But a semi-literate blogger just saw it on TV, so it is out there. If you see it, please post a comment and tell us the channel and time. Also, we’d love to know if the “You’re gonna love my nuts!” line made it into the TV-ready version of the spot.
I am confused when the poster states they don’t know where to buy the Slap Chop online. Did they think about trying slapchop.com?
Pitchman Billy Mays is a native of McKees Rocks, Pennsylvania and he’s back in the Pittsburgh area this week visiting family. The Pittsburgh Tribune-Review took this opportunity to interview their homeboy in today’s edition. Not too much new here, but there were a few nuggets of interesting info.
Billy does dye his trademark beard to hide the gray, as the natural salt-and-pepper appearance “looks kind of weird on television.” His Discovery channel show, “Pitchman: Gadgets to Glory,” will premiere in the spring.
Now, for the kicker, when asked about Vince Offer of ShamWow fame, Billy opines: “Please. He’s a one-hit wonder. He took a shot at the title but can’t compete.” If Billy thinks Vince can’t repeat his success, we guess hasn’t seen Slap Chop yet. Can’t wait to see if Vince responds. Let the pitchman smackdown begin!