Tag Archives: Infomercials

It’s a Bust: Jury to Decide Cami Secret Lawsuit

Breast intentions

The makers of the Cleava clip-on camisole went after the maker of Cami Secret with a federal suit in a claim of patent infringement. Now it’s up to a jury to decide which company had the breast intentions in mind.

“It’s a copy, definitely.”

“It’s a copy. It’s a copy, definitely,” BraNovations Inc. president Michelle De Sousa told Florida’s NBC-2. De Sousa and her business partner and husband, vice president J. D. De Sousa, claim a much larger company, Cami Secret maker Ontel, copied their product after they refused to sell it to Ontel.

The De Sousas want Ontel to stop selling the Cami Secret. They also want a piece of the millions in profits Ontel has made so far.

Ontel’s defense is that BraNovations’s patent was never valid to begin with, and that the De Sousas just “want to get money out of Ontel.”

“I want to move in the direction of getting it in the big box stores like WalMart,” said Michelle. “With [Cami Secret] being there, WalMart is not going to take a product they’re already selling.”

“It’s been a long road, a long journey,” said J.D. “Me and my wife believe we’re just starting.”

In the meantime, you can still buy Cami Secret and take advantage of this special double offer.

 

Infomercial GIFs Expose Terror of Everyday Life

infomercial gifs
Everyday life is fraught with peril at every turn!

In the infomercial universe, horrors lurk around every corner!

The cold, hard reality of everyday life, the dark underbelly just beneath the surface of the mundane, the lurking horrors that await us at every turn of our workaday lives, are exposed by the brilliant actors in this series of infomercial GIFs.

Infomercials are a public service announcement warning us of what’s about to leap out at us from behind that closed kitchen cupboard, the nasty spill that’s going to destroy everything you’ve worked so tirelessly for your entire miserable little life, the countless hidden household dangers that threaten to embarrass, to maim, to force you to jump out a plate-glass window—on fire!

The horror of exploding tacos!

exploding taco
Among our favorites of these infomercial GIFs is the woman with the exploding taco. The horror! The terrorists have clearly won.

Never attempt to pour a beverage!

But wait, there’s more! A big lesson of infomercials is that you should never, ever attempt to pour a beverage without using some kind of As Seen on TV device.

God did not intend for iron to go in dryer.

throwing iron in dryer

If you’re this stupid, no product  can help you. Everyone knows this won’t work unless the iron is still plugged in.

A word on containers and depth perception

container overflowing with food

In the infomercial universe, people are dumb and have terrible eyesight and depth perception. Witness the hands attempting to place a lid on a container overflowing with food. Will it work? Well, no—you’re going to wind up with a gigantic, soul-killing counter mess. Surely there’s a product that will come to your rescue.

View the complete series at imgur.com.

Deal of the Day: Vince Offer Resurrects Slap Chop!

Making salsa - Slap Chop Luncheon
Make quick work of salsa and countless other dishes with Slap Chop.

Infamous and inVinceable Vince Offer is back peddling his Slap Chop in an attempt to resurrect interest in this once market-dominating As Seen on TV classic. As we demonstrated in this blog post a few years ago during the Slap Chop’s heyday, it’s easy to whip up a three-course meal in no time with this ultra-handy gadget.

“Slap Chop performs pretty much as advertised. You push down on the plunger and foods get chopped. The blade is sharp. The Slap Chop seems plenty sturdy and its butterfly hinge makes it easy to clean.”

And our rave back in 2009 still holds true: “We’re happy to say that the Slap Chop performs pretty much as advertised. You push down on the plunger and foods get chopped. The blade is sharp. While it’s not by any means a precision instrument, the Slap Chop seems plenty sturdy and its butterfly hinge makes it easy to clean.”

Original offer doubled: 2 for 1, plus 2 free Graty graters

The Slap Chop is the same easy-to-use everyday kitchen appliance that millions have added to their culinary routines, and with the current deal, you can get two for the price of one, plus get a bonus gift. Order now to get two Slap Chops, plus two Graty graters for $19.95 plus S&H! The Graty is a slick, easy-to-use grater for cheeses that comes with a lid, so you can keep it in the fridge and pull it out whenever you need to kick up pasta or tacos a notch or three.

‘Does It Work?’: Light Angel Shines Bright for TV Newscaster

Station gives thumbs up to Light Angel

In its latest “Does It Work?” segment on As Seen on TV products, ABC affiliate KSFY of Sioux Falls, S.D., takes on the Anthony Sullivan-touted Light Angel.

Consumer investigator Nancy Naeve put the Light Angel to the test in her own home, with favorable results. She found that the motion-activated LED light worked perfectly for a dark closet.

“I live in a very old house where lighting is a premium,” said Naeve. “The closets are also very small, with no electricity there, so in the morning I can barely see, so I’ll be happy if this works.”

The newscaster set up the light, closed the closet door, waited a minute, and then opened the door to test the Light Angel’s motion activation and light quality.

“This one is pretty bright.”

“Oh yeah! Can you see this?” she exclaimed. “Normally I don’t like LED lights because I don’t think they get bright enough, but this one is pretty bright.”

Two for one, plus a free lantern

You can now get two Light Angels for the price of one, plus a free Olde Brooklyn Lantern, for $12.99 plus S&H. Free shipping is also available. Get the details and order Light Angel at the official website.

Guilty: TV Execs as Much to Blame as Infomercial King Kevin Trudeau

Infomercial king Kevin Trudeau is currently cooling his heels in prison for attempting to hide assets from the feds in his fight against the Federal Trade Commission related to his late-night infomercials for the book The Weight-Loss Cure “They” Don’t Want You to Know About

Trudeau not the only guilty party in late-night TV fraud

But Trudeau, who spent two years in federal prison in the early 1990s for fraud, isn’t the only guilty party here, opines editorial writer Phil Mushnick of the New York Post.

Continue reading

New Product Tuesday: Destroy Bed Gap With Mattress Wedge

Close the gap with Mattress Wedge

For New Product Tuesday, we choose an item like the Mattress Wedge that we ourselves would actually use, that we feel might actually enrich our lives. No lie! It’s funny when something like the Mattress Wedge appears on the infomercial horizon and causes something to click in your brain—that “Aha!” moment when it all becomes clear, and you realize: Here is a thing that some clever so-and-so designed to fix a very real—and very menacing—modern problem! At last!

Mattress Wedge is the award-winning patented solution that closes the gap between your mattress and the wall or headboard of any size bed. Now pillows stay comfortably under your head, not under the bed. Use it in the kids’ room, where toys disappear in the open space between the bed and wall, and you’re stuck digging in the crack to retrieve them. Place a Mattress Wedge on your child’s bed, and those toys will never get lost again.

But wait—there’s more!

Mattress Wedge also comes with two detachable pockets in which you can hold remote controls, keys and whatever else you might want to keep handy next to your head.

 

TV Station Airs Artists’ Fake ‘Infomercial’

TV viewers who tune into KTXA Channel 21 in the Dallas/Fort Worth area this Friday, Feb. 7, at 3 a.m. may not know just what to make of a new “infomercial” that’s not really selling anything. The 28-minute spot, featuring a gentleman who looks a lot like Steve McQueen whittling a walking stick and promising viewers the secret to immortal life, is part of an art exhibit by Texas artists Good/Bad Art Collective.

“Curtains,” an interactive experimental exhibit running through Feb. 16 at Nasher Sculpture Center in Dallas, invited visitors to see the set where the infomercial was filmed, and even help make the infomercial.

“At turns humorous and interactive, dark and thought-provoking, CURTAINS uses the dying medium of the infomercial to highlight the transience and ephemeral nature of the human experience,” reads the museum’s website.

The project brings to mind the 1970s commercials of experimental artist Chris Burden, who purchased late-night slots for his own weird films.

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SciMark Report: Pastafina by Chef Tony Ready for Comeback?

The Pastafina miracle cooker by Chef Tony Notaro, a retread of the Pasta Express, which debuted way back in 2006, could see new life in the direct-response TV sales market, according to product prognosticator Jordan Pine of SciMark Corp.

“I liked this product when it came out originally, and I think this revival version hits all the same, correct notes,” Pine writes at his SciMark Report blog.

Pine likes how the Pastafina commercial is shot, as well as pitchman Chef Tony’s skills: “The magic was always watching the pasta move as it cooks, and the production team has captured that. Tony is also in his element pitching anything Italian, and it shows in the passion he puts into his delivery.”

The current Pastafina As Seen on TV offer is two of the miracle vertical pasta cookers plus two recipe books for $10 plus S&P. Here’s where to order.

Here’s the original Pasta Express spot from 2006:

New Product Tuesday: Dutch Glow Amish Wood Milk

A hot new As Seen on TV product, Dutch Glow Amish Wood Milk, is being pitched as a natural alternative to traditional wood polishing products, and one that’s even more effective. The “all natural” element has us wondering: Do the Amish use only organic, all-natural products today?

“Finally, there’s a pure and simple product from a pure and simple people.”

The pitch for Dutch Glow speaks of “crafty chemical companies” that have “deceived” us for years. “Finally, there’s a pure and simple product from a pure and simple people,” says a voiceover as we see an Amish buggy sauntering down a wooded lane.

The polish claims to be based on a century-old formula invented by an Amish woodworker, and promises to break down years of wax buildup to reveal wood’s natural shine. With all this “natural” talk, where do the Amish actually stand today?

“Most Amish farms are not organic, and most Amish farmers use a variety of pesticides and fertilizers.”

According to AmishAmerica.com, the perception of the Amish as being organic stewards of the land is not all that accurate: “Most Amish farms are not organic, and most Amish farmers use a variety of pesticides and fertilizers.” For decades, says the site, the Amish have been using artificial methods to boost crop yields alongside their non-Amish agricultural counterparts. There’s been a move in recent years by some Amish farmers, though, to produce certified-organic foods.

Despite this misperception, all of us could use fewer chemicals in our daily lives and less waxy buildup on our furniture. Dutch Glow Amish Wood Milk could prove to be a “pure and simple” (and effective) addition to your home’s cleaning arsenal.

Here’s where to order Dutch Glow.