Category Archives: Safety

Infomercial GIFs Expose Terror of Everyday Life

infomercial gifs
Everyday life is fraught with peril at every turn!

In the infomercial universe, horrors lurk around every corner!

The cold, hard reality of everyday life, the dark underbelly just beneath the surface of the mundane, the lurking horrors that await us at every turn of our workaday lives, are exposed by the brilliant actors in this series of infomercial GIFs.

Infomercials are a public service announcement warning us of what’s about to leap out at us from behind that closed kitchen cupboard, the nasty spill that’s going to destroy everything you’ve worked so tirelessly for your entire miserable little life, the countless hidden household dangers that threaten to embarrass, to maim, to force you to jump out a plate-glass window—on fire!

The horror of exploding tacos!

exploding taco
Among our favorites of these infomercial GIFs is the woman with the exploding taco. The horror! The terrorists have clearly won.

Never attempt to pour a beverage!

But wait, there’s more! A big lesson of infomercials is that you should never, ever attempt to pour a beverage without using some kind of As Seen on TV device.

God did not intend for iron to go in dryer.

throwing iron in dryer

If you’re this stupid, no product  can help you. Everyone knows this won’t work unless the iron is still plugged in.

A word on containers and depth perception

container overflowing with food

In the infomercial universe, people are dumb and have terrible eyesight and depth perception. Witness the hands attempting to place a lid on a container overflowing with food. Will it work? Well, no—you’re going to wind up with a gigantic, soul-killing counter mess. Surely there’s a product that will come to your rescue.

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New Product Tuesday with Automatic Fire Extinguisher

Grotto's On Fire FireballAs you may remember, we featured this product back in July when it was being marketed as the Grotto’s On Fire Fireball, which is still the name on the packaging. This somewhat less than descriptive name made some believe this product was designed to start fires in artificial caves, and therefore not of much interest to the average consumer.

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New Product Tuesday with Grotto’s On Fire Fireball

Grotto's On Fire FireballNow here’s a great idea: A product that can automatically stop fires in your home before they get out of control. The Grotto’s On Fire Fireball releases its non-toxic fire suppression powder when it senses temperatures above 158° F. The Fireball can put out many fires completely, or can give you the extra time you and your family need to escape to safety. Where should you put a Grotto’s On Fire Fireball? Furnace room, attic, garage – anywhere you want an extra level of security. Carry one in your car. Kids going to college should have one in their dorm room. Makes a perfect gift for any occasion. The Fireball doesn’t need batteries, and is completely maintenance-free. Just leave it and forget for year-around fire prevention.