Your Savvy Shopper is not the most domestic person on the planet. I’m more at home installing RAM or shoveling the driveway than sewing a button or hemming a pair of pants. The few times I’ve attempted sewing, it’s taken me 15 minutes just to get the needle threaded. Then i could finally start making pitifully crooked and unevenly-spaced stitches. So the self-threading One Second Needle is definitely an invention that appeals to a non-tailor like me. Even if it won’t improve my sewing skill, at least it will save me time and aggravation. As Pitchmen star Anthony Sullivan says, “Just loop and thread.” Hey Sully, I know you’re offering a free bonus sewing kit with each order (just pay the obligatory extra S&H) , but how can I get that giant needle?
One thing’s for certain when it comes to As Seen on TV products: what’s old will someday be new again (or presented as such). Back in 1982, my then-girlfriend’s mother gave us her old microwave when she purchased a new one. One of the accessories she included with this generous gift was a round plastic microwave crisping tray with raised ribs and a channel around the perimeter to capture grease. It worked pretty well to cook bacon and reheat pizza. In fact, it was very similar to today’s “new” product, the Magic Crisp. That’s not a bad thing, because useful products are always welcome in the home, even if they’re not newly invented.
BTW, my girlfriend let me keep the hand-me-down nuker when she moved out after our relationship fizzled. It reheated pizza for several more years, until the morning your Savvy Shopper awoke to no clean underwear. I washed a pair in the sink, then wondered how I would get them dry so I could get on the road and not be late for work. You know where this is heading. My bright idea was to dry them in the microwave. This plan probably would have worked, had I stayed in the kitchen and monitored the progress closely. I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth when I heard the sounds of fail. I rushed to the kitchen to discover my tighty whities on fire and a lightning storm taking place inside the microwave. I pulled the plug, opened the door, grabbed the undies with tongs and flung them in the sink. The microwave was fried, but luckily I didn’t set my apartment building on fire.
Disaster averted, I dressed and left for work. I’d be going commando.
“I could fall asleep right here with this thing on me.”
The Total Pillow seems like a useful product. It’s a versatile pillow that you can twist into various shapes to support different parts of your body. But your Savvy Shopper was taken aback by the review of a real shopper wandering through a shopping mall somewhere in America. I know it’s a real shopper because the text at the bottom of the screen says, “Not actors. Real people with real opinions.” This young man declares that while standing up, in the middle of a busy, well-lit shopping mall, “I could fall asleep right here with this thing on me.” Now that’s a quite a testimonial for this thing called the Total Pillow!
When we started this blog, We’ll admit we thought it would be amusingly cute for our Savvy Shopper persona to refer to ourselves using the royal “we,” known among snooty intellectual types as a nosism. But you know what? I was wrong. See, I said “I,” and will continue to do so in the future when referring to myself as an individual. It’s annoying to write in the second person, and I’m sure it’s more annoying to read unless the writer is more talented than myself.
So that’s it. I feel liberated. We I are am so happy to be done with that pretentious charade. Oops. It will take a little time to get used to this.
Your Savvy Shopper is not the most domestic person on the planet. I’m more at home installing RAM or shoveling the driveway than sewing a button or hemming a pair of pants. The few times I’ve attempted sewing, it’s taken me 15 minutes just to get the needle threaded. Then i could finally start making pitifully crooked and unevenly-spaced stitches. So the self-threading One Second Needle is definitely an invention that appeals to a non-tailor like me. Even if it won’t improve my sewing skill, at least it will save me time and aggravation. As Pitchmen star Anthony Sullivan says, “Just loop and thread.” Hey Sully, I know you’re offering a free bonus sewing kit with each order (just pay the obligatory extra S&H) , but how can I get that giant needle?
